from: gülizar çuhacı
title: from a distance
form: text; e-mail letter

"Hakan Akçura asked my opinion on his paintings." "What did you say to him?" "I said I liked them, that you didn't like them much expect for the picture hanged on the right-hand wall of the first alley on the left, and the ones hang across it, that you said you found them different from the other pictures." "Well, yes I had said so after leaving the exhibition, your memory serves right."

This was about one year ago.... Now a third person says "Yes, he was broken when you left him, do you remember you said many times to him to remain friends, to keep your mutual affection, but not to remain lovers." "Yes, I remember" "You said so, but I understand he befriended a man through the Internet, a certain Hakan Akçura". "Yes, it's true." "And that man recommended him to remain friends with you, so he keeps on thinking aloud to talk to you, to suggest you to remain friends." "Oh, I see, but I fear I will not be able to remain friends with him if I look in his eyes again."

Now we are enemies, let alone friends. Now I understand it is one of the saddest things in the world not to be able to tell the truth to the man you leaned your head to for years, to see him acting like an enemy.

Hakan Akçura existed in my life because of the above mentioned incident; so whenever I see a photograph of his or read his name somewhere, I always remember that old lover of mine across the years. It is strange, isn't it...